[ He claps him on the back, grabbing him by the arm to lead him over towards where the other guys they came with are, in time for Mr Brightside to start up. There is actually a law that you have to join in with Mr Brightside. You can't not enjoy yourself. Even if you're Nathan Jones. ]
[ And Matt isn't far away, like his weird little protector, swooping in. ]
You're barking up the wrong tree, love. Nice a tree as it is. He's not interested. Why don't you let the man enjoy himself eh?
[ She doesn't seem impressed to be cut off in her attempts. Whether she gets that he's gay or not. She doesn't seem dissuaded. For now at least, she rolls her eyes and walks off. But no doubt she'll be back. Matt turns to Nate, putting a hand to his shoulder as he leans in to try and be heard. ]
I'd work my charms but she's got her sights set on you.
[He hates this stuff. It doesn't happen to him often but it's always weird.]
Yeah. Think I'll get another drink. In the meantime, you should go chat him up for me. [He points out a guy who definitely isn't hitting any stereotypes that Matt likely attributes to the gay community. But he's surrounded by girls and not getting flirty with any of them so...]
[ Matt looks at the guy and wonders if maybe Nate means someone else?? But no, it's him. He laughs though, shaking his head. ]
You want to chat someone up you gotta do it yourself. We don't want him thinking I want to shag him. I'm just here for moral support. You get your gay on. Once you've got that round in, that is.
[ Well yes he's definitely done that, but the point is none of that is gay. Matt isn't gay. He doesn't do gay. Damn. Sigh. Fine. ]
Okay okay, I'll go talk to the guy. But make mine a double.
[ And he'll do it. He really will. Nate deserves a bit of fun after all. So he goes over to the guy. Nate's right, isn't he? Just do what you'd do if you were helping any mate out. To his credit, he actually tries. ]
[The guy seems receptive to what Matt is saying, glancing over at Nate and smiling a bit. Yeah, he's interested. He writes his number down on a napkin and hands it over to Matt.
Success!
Nate comes back with drinks but hangs back at their table, trying not to look over where Matt is too much. So smooth.]
[So messy. Nate doesn't get quite as drunk as he was after Jeffrey dumped him, but...close. There's a lot more dancing involved. And that girl keeps coming around. Kelly. Nathan minds less when he's drunk at least.]
[ Matt gets absolutely hammered. The sort of drunk where seeing straight is an artform. As well as standing. He's enjoying himself though, between bouts of telling Kelly to bugger off. He laughs, clapping his hand to Nate's arm. ]
Nah you're a good guy man, I love ya. I do. I mean it. You're my best fucking mate, you know that, Nate? You don't mind me callin you Nate do ya?
[remember how intense Nate's accent gets when he's drinking? And how loud it is in this club? Yeahhh.. So there's an unintelligible answer, a string of very welsh noises, ending with.]
[ He slams his hand down heavily against the edge of the bar they're leaning against ]. Shots. Yes! Good fucking idea man.
[ Despite having come with a bunch of people, it seems they've spent most the night talking to each other. Matt will get the shots, I'm not rping that, they just appear. There are definitely more than they need. ]
[Nate just laughs at the ridiculous amount of alcohol. He's super drunk now, whoops. Putting a hand on Matt's shoulder, he uses him to keep balance as they head outside.]
Shit. I should sober up before I try to text that guy. What was his fucking name? Ben? Bill? Bob? Something like that.
Shit man careful careful [ he tries to help but almost knocks himself over in the process. Smooth. ]
Yes! [ he points at him and claps him on the arm like he has any sort of idea what he's talking about. ]
Nothing better than a blow job. Apart from sex. The rest of sex. Hey hey hey [ his voice raises in pitch ] which do you do? Like the gay thing. You the sexee or the sexer?
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Yeah, that won't be awkward or anything.
This was a bad idea.
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[ He claps him on the back, grabbing him by the arm to lead him over towards where the other guys they came with are, in time for Mr Brightside to start up. There is actually a law that you have to join in with Mr Brightside. You can't not enjoy yourself. Even if you're Nathan Jones. ]
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Except it draws the attention of that girl again so now she's all up in his business.]
Sorry- no. I mean, I'm sure you're a sweet girl, but.
[Matt help]
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You're barking up the wrong tree, love. Nice a tree as it is. He's not interested. Why don't you let the man enjoy himself eh?
[ She doesn't seem impressed to be cut off in her attempts. Whether she gets that he's gay or not. She doesn't seem dissuaded. For now at least, she rolls her eyes and walks off. But no doubt she'll be back. Matt turns to Nate, putting a hand to his shoulder as he leans in to try and be heard. ]
I'd work my charms but she's got her sights set on you.
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Yeah. Think I'll get another drink. In the meantime, you should go chat him up for me. [He points out a guy who definitely isn't hitting any stereotypes that Matt likely attributes to the gay community. But he's surrounded by girls and not getting flirty with any of them so...]
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You want to chat someone up you gotta do it yourself. We don't want him thinking I want to shag him. I'm just here for moral support. You get your gay on. Once you've got that round in, that is.
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[Matt you're the worst.]
Eh, forget it. He probably wouldn't be interested anyway.
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Okay okay, I'll go talk to the guy. But make mine a double.
[ And he'll do it. He really will. Nate deserves a bit of fun after all. So he goes over to the guy. Nate's right, isn't he? Just do what you'd do if you were helping any mate out. To his credit, he actually tries. ]
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Success!
Nate comes back with drinks but hangs back at their table, trying not to look over where Matt is too much. So smooth.]
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[ And that's weird. He's never done something like that before. Even weirder when the guy thought he was the one hitting on him at first. ]
But don't you go abandoning me to suck dick. We are getting smashed first.
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Yeah, I'm here with you guys. I'll text him once we leave or something.
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[ This is going to get messy ]
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Nah you're a good guy man, I love ya. I do. I mean it. You're my best fucking mate, you know that, Nate? You don't mind me callin you Nate do ya?
[ #DrunkIrish ]
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...yeah?
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[ Truly, Matt has no idea what Nate is saying, but he certainly seems to think he does, and is replying with heaps of enthusiasm. ]
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Last shot and then we'll go?
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[ He slams his hand down heavily against the edge of the bar they're leaning against ]. Shots. Yes! Good fucking idea man.
[ Despite having come with a bunch of people, it seems they've spent most the night talking to each other. Matt will get the shots, I'm not rping that, they just appear. There are definitely more than they need. ]
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Shit. I should sober up before I try to text that guy. What was his fucking name? Ben? Bill? Bob? Something like that.
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Bonnie! Wait no that's a girls name no. Anyway anyway anyway I don't think it's his name he wants you to suck if you know what I mean what I mean.
[ he pulls a face a bit ]
Do you do that? The sucking?
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Shit! Yeah- I mean I don't mind it. Better if I know I'll get the favor returned, yeah?
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Yes! [ he points at him and claps him on the arm like he has any sort of idea what he's talking about. ]
Nothing better than a blow job. Apart from sex. The rest of sex. Hey hey hey [ his voice raises in pitch ] which do you do? Like the gay thing. You the sexee or the sexer?
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Yeah? Serious?
And you like being fucked? Like up the arse? [ Well he definitely doesn't have a vagina, Matthew ]
But you like tucking people too? Who'd you want to fuck?
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Jeffrey was alright. Never would have guessed he was the sort, I bet. But he didn't want any part of having a go. Just wanted me to let him have it.
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