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[byrned]

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[byrned]

[ It's odd but it makes him almost panic. It's hard to imagine not living with Nate, and frankly the thought of someone taking his place makes him feel sick ]

Fuck no. You're not getting rid of me yet. I'd stay here after the wedding if I could but not sure the Mrs would appreciate. [ telling, Matt, very telling ]

[cravating]

Trade in your honeymoon for pizza and crap tv, yeah? Wouldn't be so bad. [But that can't be their life and he knows it. Instead of dwelling on it, he busies himself with putting clothes away.]

[byrned]

Now that's my kind of honeymoon. Just with, you know, lots more sex.

[ He lifts the suitcase onto his bed, hissing a little in the process like the effort somehow hurt. It won't be something he draws attention to. Instead he just opens up the case and starts unpacking Sally's things and putting them in his wardrobe (his own tend to get relegated to the drawer or the back of a chair). ]

[cravating]

[Nate turns and gives Matt an odd look.]

You alright, mate?

[byrned]

What? No I'm fine. Just pulled a muscle.

[ Lies, all lies. The funny thing is, it isn't the first time Matt's come back from Ireland having 'pulled something', only usually it's something to do with his dad. Not this time. But it wasn't like his dad. She didn't mean to, did she? She didn't mean to hurt him, she'd just been emotional. It's fine. It'll be fine. ]

[cravating]

[Nate's brow creases with worry.]

I'll get the ice. [He assumes it was his dad. Even if Matt says the visit was good, it has to have been his dad, right? But Nate knows not to push Matt to tell him the details, but that doesn't mean he won't take care of him.]

[byrned]

Thanks

[ He knows he doesn't have to say anything. He never has to say anything around Nate. He just gets it. He gets him, he always had. He can't imagine Sal ever getting him. It's a thought that almost makes him feel guilty. He shouldn't think like that about Sal. He's going to marry her. He should love her, or at least try. He owes her that.

Waiting for Nate to gets the ice, he lifts his shirt a little, where a gentle bruise is yellowing across his ribs. It's small, but no less significant for it. As soon as he's back he lets go of his shirt, trying to hide it. ]

She didn't mean to. She's just a passionate person.

[cravating]

[Coming back with an ice pack, Nate catches sight of the bruise and shakes his head. But Matt's words make him stop dead in his tracks.]

She? I thought-- Wait, you mean Sally hit you?

[There's anger in his eyes all of a sudden, like he'd rip into her if she were right in front of him. Matt outs up with this shit from his dad and Nate has no say in that, but anyone else? Oh, he won't stand for it.]

[byrned]

She didn't hit me. It wasn't like that. She was just frustrated. She wasn't trying to hurt me. Nate come on, don't give me that look.

[ He reaches out for the ice pack and puts it against himself, over his tshirt. He hadn't meant to out it, but then it's hard not to say things to Nate. ]

She's a wonderful woman, really.

[cravating]

You frustrate the piss out of me on an hourly basis and I'm not the one leaving marks on you, am I?

[No, she does not get a pass. She does not get excused.]

[byrned]

Tell it like you mean it, mate. But really, it's not as bad as it looks. It was an accident. Really. Not like it happens all the time.

[ But it has happened before. Not that he plans on revealing that now. ]

Just help me unpack the rest of this shit, yeah? And don't fucking say anything to her, you hear me?

[cravating]

[His jaw is clenched, worry very clearly not subsiding with his explanation. An accident. He says it's an accident and Nate can't help but wonder just how many other accidents Matt's had since seeing Sal.]

Yeah. Not a word. [He goes back to putting clothes away but can't help but glance at Matt every now and then.]

[byrned]

[ It carried on that way, an accident here or there, Matt taking more shifts and playing less piano. Being shaped, just the way Sally thinks he should be, not how he wants to be. Not who he wants to be.

Until one day? In the middle of the afternoon, Matt hasn't been to work. Missed a shift, didn't bother to call in. He's at home, and the bottle of whisky he's had on the shelf for the best part of a year is now almost empty, and he's blind drunk, hunched forward on the sofa. ]

[cravating]

[Nate tries to stay out of it. He cares- of course he cares, but Matt makes it clear that he needs to stay out of it. So he tries his best to keep to his own life and out of matts.

That is, of course, until he comes home and sees Matt hunched over on the sofa with a nearly empty whiskey bottle in front of him.]

Matt? Mate...fuck what's wrong?

[byrned]

[ He doesn't register him coming in, he barely even registers him in front of him, but when he talks, Matt lifts his head. His eyes are rimmed with red, and he's clearly been crying. ]

Apparently I wasn't enough! [ His voice is slurred from the drink. ]

Because she had to go and fuck Paul. Big fucking hot shot Paul.

[cravating]

Fuck. [He sits next to Matt on the sofa, trying to move the bottle away from him without drawing a lot of attention to that.]

You're sure?

[byrned]

Oh I'm fucking sure. Sure as you suck dicks I'm sure. Weddings off. Not that it was ever really on.

[ He delves in his pocket and pulls out the engagement ring, throwing it down on the coffee table. ]

I need a fucking drink.

[cravating]

Think you've had enough of that, mate. Just... Forget about her. She was never good enough for you anyway.

[byrned]

What do you mean forget about her? [ His voice raises, angry. ] She was the love of my fucking life. What you think with her out the way you can have me instead?
[
He doesn't mean that, not really, he's had way too much whisky and has far too much emotion. Lashing out at the people that matter is a Byrne trait. ]

[cravating]

[It hurts of course, but Nate knows him well enough to not flinch.]

You're drunk. And hurt, I get that. But she wasn't the love of your life. The love of your life wouldn't do that to you, would she?

[byrned]

What would you know about it.

[ He huffs and wipes a hand over his face. ] Well fuck it. Fuck it. I'm going to get laid. Going to find some bird and fuck her into next week. Right here on this couch.

[cravating]

[Well...that's an option. Nate shifts, a little uncomfortable but he can't make decisions for Matt.]

Just give me a little notice so I can be scarce.

[Maybe Matt can get this out of his system and move on. That would be alright.]

[byrned]

[ But he doesn't get it out of his system. Weeks pass, and Matt does exactly as he said he would; he gets laid, quite a lot, with more women than he ever did before Sally. It's different now though, each time fuelled with alcohol, and rarely kind, rarely nice. In the pub with their friends he brags about it.

Luce pulls him aside one day, tries to tell him, but he doesn't listen. Blind to it, or simply too far gone. He doesn't listen to anyone.

He's starting to fail at uni too, his classes getting behind, if he bothers to turn up at them at all.

Another day, and it's all the same, Matt comes home (alone for once), but as drunk as ever. Something's got to give. ]

[cravating]

[Nate tries to ignore it, tries to give him time to grieve and get back to normal. But he doesn't. And Nate can't fucking live like this, can't let Matt destroy himself like he is. He talks to Lucy and tries to get her help but Matt won't listen to her.

It has to be him. He knows it does.]

Hey, mate. [He says, trying not to sound nervous about this.] Why don't you come have a seat. Feel like I never see you anymore.

[byrned]

I don't want a seat.

[ He mumbles the words out as he walks past him and heads right towards the kitchen to grab a bottle of anything he can find and pour far too much of it into a glass. He walks back in to look at him. ]

Yeah and we all know you want to see me don't you.