"I know you will babe," he says, doing his best to keep his breathing even. He looks over towards him, eyes searching a moment, drinking him in as though it helps. His gaze drops down towards his crotch. Maybe thinking about what's next, maybe just wanting a look. Possibly a bit of both.
"How's best for this?" He asks, a bit shaky. Not sure if him being on his front would make it easier first time, to give Nate better control over what he's doing. But Nate's kind of the expert here.
As much as Nate would love to look Matt in the eyes as they do this for the first time, it's probably best to have him turn over. There's more control on his end and Matt would be able to grab onto a pillow if things got to intense.
"Turn over for me." He says quietly, pumping his fingers within him a few more times before he withdraws them so Matt can comply with the request. While he waits, he grabs the bottle of lube again to spread some over his cock.
When Nate's hand withdraws, somehow its previous presence feels all the more apparent. He feels excited he thinks, really he isn't quite sure what this feeling is, like a lump in his stomach.
He takes a deep breath and sits himself up a bit, ready to turn, but not before reaching his hand up to Nate's cheek and holding him as he leans in and kisses him with more than a little strength behind it. Not quite making a show but... needing it, maybe.
That done, he takes another breath and turns on the bed, gathering the pillows a bit to lean his elbows against as he settles down on his knees, resting back a little against his calves.
This feels more real than ever now, and his heart races so fast he can feel it in his stomach.
Nate kisses Matt back with all he's got. Trying to help him feel more confident about things in that moment. His hand smooths over Matt's back, rubbing gently. He moves back behind Matt and pulls his hand back down to Matt's hip as he uses his other hand to grab his cock and position himself without actually pressing forward yet.
"Ready?" Just another check in before he gets on with it. He just wants to be sure.
His answer isn't immediate. He's fucking nervous, he isn't going to pretend that he isn't. He takes a long breath, trying to focus and control his rushing heartbeat. He needs to relax.
He can feel him behind him, feel his cock against his skin. It's a good sign that that turns him on. Fuck how much that would have freaked him out before.
"Yeah," he says, trying not to think about the fact Nate's cock is pretty lengthy. Or maybe trying to think about it. He's not sure. "Yeah, ready babe."
It's strange that he's suddenly nervous. Well, maybe not all that strange. There's a lot riding on this, on him making it a good experience for Matt. There won't really be a second chance to make a first impression here.
But he can't think of it like that. All he can do is try to make Matt feel as good as possible. The rest will sort itself out.
Carefully, he keeps hold of Matt's hip with one hand while he guides himself forward, slowly pressing the head of his cock against him, working it in and pausing to just allow him to get used to that feeling. The hand on Matt's hip shifts to smooth over his back, rubbing over the skin lovingly.
As Nate starts to press inside him the feeling is intense, stretched more than he was before, and it makes him let out a small noise before he stifles it a little. Instinctively, his hips move forward a little, as if to pull away, but he stops that, tempering himself and taking a deep breath before he bites down a little against his lip, dropping his head forward.
It's not entirely comfortable, it's fair to say. Bordering on painful, and yet at the same time not bad as such. And still, it's interesting, he's had a lot of sex, but he's never been on the receiving end, never knowing how it feels from that side of things.
"Yeah," he manages in response, a little strained, the touch soothing him a little.
Nate still remembers his first few times, the way it felt wrong and right at the same time. The sensation of almost pain, but not quite. At Matt's request, he presses forward, sinking another inch or so before he pulls back, just giving a few slow, shallow thrusts to get him used to the feel of it.
"It feels so good Matt. Better than I could have imagined." His hands run over Matt's back and hips, lovingly caressing him, trying to add those additional sensations to make this a positive experience.
There's no specific effort that needs to be made in holding back the quips he'd usually come up with. It's all he can do just to keep breathing, and when Nate starts to move a little, however shallowly, he lets out a slight noise, an almost moan, if somewhat pained. He bites into his lip. But it actually feels pretty good, and it's almost weird how much it suddenly turns him on to be on the receiving end.
"Shit."
He grips a little into the pillow, and then lets out a small laugh.
"I can't believe we're fucking doing this," he manages, before adding, "what's the view like from there?"
"You're beautiful." He says without a single moment of hesitation. Nate's not as chatty as Matt can be, and what he wants to convey here is more about encouragement than anything else.
"Just a bit more." Well, about half to go. As Matt had observed, Nate was fairly long, but he was taking it slow, easing Matt into this. This time, when he pushed forward, he allowed himself to sink another inch or so deeper.
"How's it feel? Too much?" He knows it can be overwhelming. And if it is, he'll slow down even more. He wants everything about this to be the best experience possible.
The next inward movement has Matt biting back another moan, this one a little richer than the last, a little more full. The question earns him a little focus, and he takes a moment before answering entirely honestly.
"It fucking hurts," he says on a breath. But then there are lots of things that hurt, and a lot of them can be good too. Pain is a funny sort of thing, and this feels good too. He still can't quite get his head around that.
He can't help at the same time feel almost guilty, because although up to now he's been purposefully fairly gentle with Nate, he's still had sex with him with enough gusto. Now he's on the other end of that, maybe he has earned a brand new appreciation for just how intense that could be.
"But it's good," he adds on, on an outward breath before that twists more to a moan. "Your cock feels so hard."
Nate wishes that it didn't have to hurt at all. Part of him wants to stop all of this just to stop Matt from feeling any pain associated with him. But he knows this is just how it goes, and that it does get easier. You get used to it. And Matt's telling him that it's still good, so he has to listen to that.
"It is hard. So, so hard and all for you." His hands move softly over Matt's hips, moving up over his back. With a soft grip, he holds onto Matt's hips and pulls him back to meet his next slow thrust.
"Feels so good to be in you. Never could have imagined it would feel like this."
He'd be lying if he said he'd ever thought about doing this. He hasn't. It's about as far from the things he fantasises about as anything could be. Maybe then that makes it even more surprising that as he gets used to the pain and the discomfort, that beneath that? There's something much more pleasurable.
As Nate pulls him back against him he lets out a slight cry. The pain seems to mix with something else, and it makes it hard to define, all he knows, is he's not about to ask him to stop.
No sooner than he's called out he follows it up with a breathy, "I'm fine," knowing that Nate would worry, knowing how much he cares.
"Fuck," another breath, overwhelmed, and even more so as his words sink in. "Keep going babe. Go on. Fuck me."
Each noise Matt makes sends a jolt through him, turns him on but worries him all at once. The reassurance is good, a clear understanding that this isn't too far, that it doesn't hurt too much. The very last thing he wants to do is hurt him.
"Still trying to call the shots, are you?" He says with a breathy laugh. "I'll take care of you, don't worry." He knows it's just a matter of word choice, but... Nate doesn't want to fuck Matt. This is the very definition of making love, as far as he's concerned.
He does pick up the pace a little, holding onto Matt's hips as he starts to move with a bit more purpose.
By now, Matt finds himself letting go. Giving in, if that's the right term for it, he can't really think straight right now, so finding words is way off the menu.
There's something nearly a laugh in response to Nate's comment, but that's short lived as it gives way to something much richer and deeper.
A hand grips tightly into the sheets, each inwards thrust more intense in a frankly wonderful way. He pushes his palm agains the bed and tries to reach his hand back to grab hold of him in any way that he might be able to.
"Nate," he manages his name, breathy, desperate, and loving --if he can manage that--. This should be terrifying, but it's not. It just feels right.
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"How's best for this?" He asks, a bit shaky. Not sure if him being on his front would make it easier first time, to give Nate better control over what he's doing. But Nate's kind of the expert here.
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"Turn over for me." He says quietly, pumping his fingers within him a few more times before he withdraws them so Matt can comply with the request. While he waits, he grabs the bottle of lube again to spread some over his cock.
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He takes a deep breath and sits himself up a bit, ready to turn, but not before reaching his hand up to Nate's cheek and holding him as he leans in and kisses him with more than a little strength behind it. Not quite making a show but... needing it, maybe.
That done, he takes another breath and turns on the bed, gathering the pillows a bit to lean his elbows against as he settles down on his knees, resting back a little against his calves.
This feels more real than ever now, and his heart races so fast he can feel it in his stomach.
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"Ready?" Just another check in before he gets on with it. He just wants to be sure.
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He can feel him behind him, feel his cock against his skin. It's a good sign that that turns him on. Fuck how much that would have freaked him out before.
"Yeah," he says, trying not to think about the fact Nate's cock is pretty lengthy. Or maybe trying to think about it. He's not sure. "Yeah, ready babe."
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But he can't think of it like that. All he can do is try to make Matt feel as good as possible. The rest will sort itself out.
Carefully, he keeps hold of Matt's hip with one hand while he guides himself forward, slowly pressing the head of his cock against him, working it in and pausing to just allow him to get used to that feeling. The hand on Matt's hip shifts to smooth over his back, rubbing over the skin lovingly.
"See? Not so bad."
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It's not entirely comfortable, it's fair to say. Bordering on painful, and yet at the same time not bad as such. And still, it's interesting, he's had a lot of sex, but he's never been on the receiving end, never knowing how it feels from that side of things.
"Yeah," he manages in response, a little strained, the touch soothing him a little.
"Keep going."
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"It feels so good Matt. Better than I could have imagined." His hands run over Matt's back and hips, lovingly caressing him, trying to add those additional sensations to make this a positive experience.
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"Shit."
He grips a little into the pillow, and then lets out a small laugh.
"I can't believe we're fucking doing this," he manages, before adding, "what's the view like from there?"
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"Just a bit more." Well, about half to go. As Matt had observed, Nate was fairly long, but he was taking it slow, easing Matt into this. This time, when he pushed forward, he allowed himself to sink another inch or so deeper.
"How's it feel? Too much?" He knows it can be overwhelming. And if it is, he'll slow down even more. He wants everything about this to be the best experience possible.
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"It fucking hurts," he says on a breath. But then there are lots of things that hurt, and a lot of them can be good too. Pain is a funny sort of thing, and this feels good too. He still can't quite get his head around that.
He can't help at the same time feel almost guilty, because although up to now he's been purposefully fairly gentle with Nate, he's still had sex with him with enough gusto. Now he's on the other end of that, maybe he has earned a brand new appreciation for just how intense that could be.
"But it's good," he adds on, on an outward breath before that twists more to a moan. "Your cock feels so hard."
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"It is hard. So, so hard and all for you." His hands move softly over Matt's hips, moving up over his back. With a soft grip, he holds onto Matt's hips and pulls him back to meet his next slow thrust.
"Feels so good to be in you. Never could have imagined it would feel like this."
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As Nate pulls him back against him he lets out a slight cry. The pain seems to mix with something else, and it makes it hard to define, all he knows, is he's not about to ask him to stop.
No sooner than he's called out he follows it up with a breathy, "I'm fine," knowing that Nate would worry, knowing how much he cares.
"Fuck," another breath, overwhelmed, and even more so as his words sink in. "Keep going babe. Go on. Fuck me."
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"Still trying to call the shots, are you?" He says with a breathy laugh. "I'll take care of you, don't worry." He knows it's just a matter of word choice, but... Nate doesn't want to fuck Matt. This is the very definition of making love, as far as he's concerned.
He does pick up the pace a little, holding onto Matt's hips as he starts to move with a bit more purpose.
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There's something nearly a laugh in response to Nate's comment, but that's short lived as it gives way to something much richer and deeper.
A hand grips tightly into the sheets, each inwards thrust more intense in a frankly wonderful way. He pushes his palm agains the bed and tries to reach his hand back to grab hold of him in any way that he might be able to.
"Nate," he manages his name, breathy, desperate, and loving --if he can manage that--. This should be terrifying, but it's not. It just feels right.